So many things going on in this big world. So many things going on in my little life. Which one do you think I should be focusing on?
I think people in general get so fed up with the monotony of their own daily problems and the reality that's right in your face, it is too easy to become more focused on the tabloid news. I found myself obsessed this year with the Casey Anthony trial, the Jon and Kate Drama, and hooked on several reality TV shows. Why?
Now, as I reflect back, I wonder why I am not more concerned that my country is on the verge of bankruptcy, that so many young soldiers are still dying for whatever political actions that are active at the moment. The moral fiber of my country is degrading at a more rapid rate than I could ever imagine, to match the economic decline that surrounds us. Insurrection and rebellion, coupled with the lack of respect for our fellow man and the laws of both state and religion are propelling us into a spiral of hate and violent behaviors.
I surmise the reason for my lack of interest is the simple fact I am turning the other cheek at the things I have no control over. I hide in the world of other peoples drama and problems. I take interest in how they react and respond to solving their dilemmas, when I cannot solve my own. It is my escape.
I believe it is healthy to escape for a little while. I imagine without a break from the everyday reality of my own problems and the stress of the bigger issues my mental state would blow a fuse. I have no answer to how long I should escape. I know full well all the things I am ignoring are still there. I know there are things that need to be dealt with on a personal level and things I should be more concerned with on a world level. When I am ready, I will tackle them. But for today, I think I'll step back and enjoy the sunshine and worry about what color mulch my flower beds need. That's something in my face everyday, and I have total control over. It may not matter in the big picture, but it matters to me.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Friday, June 3, 2011
Comings and Goings.
Once in a while I hear someone asking for advice on how to deal with a dying friend, relative, coworker. It seems to be an awkward situation for a lot of people. We are not sure how to talk to the afflicted person. What do I say? What should I do?
I think the problem is not with the dying person, but how WE are reacting to it. Afterall, we are all dying. A terminally ill person just has a heads up on WHEN.
The thing, I believe, is best received, is to just be there and take your que from them. Remember above all else that if you are interacting with someone, they are indeed living. Living with a terminal disease. Living for each precious moment. We need to treat each day, and each minute, as if it were our last. Most of us just never know. It could be.
It is perfectly acceptable to be angry, or sad or any of the other stages of grief that are necessary to deal with the impending loss of life. But, today we are not yet lost. We are lucky to have today. Cherish all the "right nows" that we are blessed to have. Don't dwell on that which has not yet happened. If you must cry together it will be fine, if you must laugh together it will be a memory you have made. When you remember the good times with someone who has so few left, you are making another good time to cherish in the future. Even if their future has a date on it, they will have a new moment to reflect on, and you will have a memory to last a lifetime, no matter how short that lifetime is.
As I get older, I have had to see the passing of more and more friends, relatives and sometimes just folks I was blessed to know a short time, Each one has left an impression on me, and I have taken a bit of them to live on with me. Though they are gone in body, they live on in my memory and sometimes in the things I do and say. They leave a legacy in whatever we take away from knowing them. A thought, a memory or even a tradition we have learned and carried on from them. I wish I had taken the time to thank them for making me who I am today.
When we lose a loved one we mourn "OUR" loss the most. I have found it is natural to turn our thoughts to what we have left of that person. Physical mementos at first, then the memories kick in. With that knowledge in hand, I take a little comfort in spending time with those we know we are about to lose. I find it a time of collecting those precious moments we are going to need in our future.
My best advise to those who are in avoidance of the terminally ill, for lack of knowing how to deal with the situation, Just be there. You are blessed to have the moments you have. You are fortunate to be able to accumulate new memories for both of you to reflect on when needed. You have that chance to say or do whatever it is that needs said or done. Don't go into it as a visit with the "dying" person. They are alive for now. Don't let your chance slip away to achieve that which will only be available for a short time. We are all dying, and we are all leaving someone behind. We just don't know when.
I think the problem is not with the dying person, but how WE are reacting to it. Afterall, we are all dying. A terminally ill person just has a heads up on WHEN.
The thing, I believe, is best received, is to just be there and take your que from them. Remember above all else that if you are interacting with someone, they are indeed living. Living with a terminal disease. Living for each precious moment. We need to treat each day, and each minute, as if it were our last. Most of us just never know. It could be.
It is perfectly acceptable to be angry, or sad or any of the other stages of grief that are necessary to deal with the impending loss of life. But, today we are not yet lost. We are lucky to have today. Cherish all the "right nows" that we are blessed to have. Don't dwell on that which has not yet happened. If you must cry together it will be fine, if you must laugh together it will be a memory you have made. When you remember the good times with someone who has so few left, you are making another good time to cherish in the future. Even if their future has a date on it, they will have a new moment to reflect on, and you will have a memory to last a lifetime, no matter how short that lifetime is.
As I get older, I have had to see the passing of more and more friends, relatives and sometimes just folks I was blessed to know a short time, Each one has left an impression on me, and I have taken a bit of them to live on with me. Though they are gone in body, they live on in my memory and sometimes in the things I do and say. They leave a legacy in whatever we take away from knowing them. A thought, a memory or even a tradition we have learned and carried on from them. I wish I had taken the time to thank them for making me who I am today.
When we lose a loved one we mourn "OUR" loss the most. I have found it is natural to turn our thoughts to what we have left of that person. Physical mementos at first, then the memories kick in. With that knowledge in hand, I take a little comfort in spending time with those we know we are about to lose. I find it a time of collecting those precious moments we are going to need in our future.
My best advise to those who are in avoidance of the terminally ill, for lack of knowing how to deal with the situation, Just be there. You are blessed to have the moments you have. You are fortunate to be able to accumulate new memories for both of you to reflect on when needed. You have that chance to say or do whatever it is that needs said or done. Don't go into it as a visit with the "dying" person. They are alive for now. Don't let your chance slip away to achieve that which will only be available for a short time. We are all dying, and we are all leaving someone behind. We just don't know when.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Whatever happened to personal responsibility?
Does any one ever wonder why we need directions on simple everyday items, like shampoo? I am amazed everyday when I hear the news at the stupidity of the people of this world. What amazes me more is the fact these people and their surviving families blame everyone else for their stupidity.
Case point today. We are trying to blame McDonalds' for childhood obesity. Really? Can anyone with a half wit not see that this is true ignorance. Stupid people have been coddled and protected by our legal system and government for so long, I guess we are now incapable of making any sort of reasonable decisions for ourselves. What next, outlaw ice cream?
Why not just back off and let nature take its course? Natural selection if you will. If only our legal system would refuse to bring to court these lawsuits that rewards the stupid of the world for being stupid, perhaps, just perhaps, folks would start thinking for themselves and take responsibility for the results of their actions.
Stupid will always be there, this I understand, but, come on folks, we gotta quit rewarding it! No more free handouts if you are dependent on drugs or alcohol. No more free medical care because you partied so hard you killed your liver and braincells. No more out of court settlements because you didn't listen in school and are too stupid to understand how the world works.
If you don't let me correct my child and take the power away from the teachers and police, DO NOT be surprised that they turn out to be a problem. Law enforcement cannot violate our civil rights even if we violate everyone elses. Parents cannot use physical force to control our children and standing in a corner for an hour is now cruelty. Don't even suggest washing a kids mouth out with soap. And they wonder why things can't be as simple as they used to be. Therapy replaces getting up and dusting off your britches, when life kicks you. We have disorders now. Hoarders used to be packrats, and overeaters were not a problem, if you were also overworked to get that food.
I love modern convenience, but come on, you gotta take responsibility and use your brain. If your pants don't fit anymore, maybe you need to get up off the couch and get some exercise. Choose vegetables over french fries for a couple of weeks. Its not Mcdonalds fault your kid is fat. Take him camping instead of parking him in front of the computer with a happy meal. You want to blame someone for the worlds problems, look in the mirror. Its got to change one person at a time. Start with yourself, it may just catch on........
Case point today. We are trying to blame McDonalds' for childhood obesity. Really? Can anyone with a half wit not see that this is true ignorance. Stupid people have been coddled and protected by our legal system and government for so long, I guess we are now incapable of making any sort of reasonable decisions for ourselves. What next, outlaw ice cream?
Why not just back off and let nature take its course? Natural selection if you will. If only our legal system would refuse to bring to court these lawsuits that rewards the stupid of the world for being stupid, perhaps, just perhaps, folks would start thinking for themselves and take responsibility for the results of their actions.
Stupid will always be there, this I understand, but, come on folks, we gotta quit rewarding it! No more free handouts if you are dependent on drugs or alcohol. No more free medical care because you partied so hard you killed your liver and braincells. No more out of court settlements because you didn't listen in school and are too stupid to understand how the world works.
If you don't let me correct my child and take the power away from the teachers and police, DO NOT be surprised that they turn out to be a problem. Law enforcement cannot violate our civil rights even if we violate everyone elses. Parents cannot use physical force to control our children and standing in a corner for an hour is now cruelty. Don't even suggest washing a kids mouth out with soap. And they wonder why things can't be as simple as they used to be. Therapy replaces getting up and dusting off your britches, when life kicks you. We have disorders now. Hoarders used to be packrats, and overeaters were not a problem, if you were also overworked to get that food.
I love modern convenience, but come on, you gotta take responsibility and use your brain. If your pants don't fit anymore, maybe you need to get up off the couch and get some exercise. Choose vegetables over french fries for a couple of weeks. Its not Mcdonalds fault your kid is fat. Take him camping instead of parking him in front of the computer with a happy meal. You want to blame someone for the worlds problems, look in the mirror. Its got to change one person at a time. Start with yourself, it may just catch on........
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Just getting back?
So my last entry was January and it is now May. Hmmmmm, must not have been too bored for the last few months. Lets look back and fill in the blanks.
Business has been quite a struggle and the economy has pretty well been the worst I have seen in my lifetime.
My sanity has come into question several times and I'm not even sure what that means or particularly care. I mean, what is sanity anyway. Somebody determines what normal is and any deviation from that puts you in some negatively percieved catagory. Whatever. I'm happy enough. I follow the rules and play along with "normal". Where I go inside my mind is my business, as long as it stays inside, right? No need for an answer here, really, it is rehtorical.
Spring has arrived in my home state and with it the rains that wash away the blues of winter. I watch them fade away and turn green. The flowers are once again appearing and I find myself braking more for those little critters and varmits that haven't learned the roadways are where they go to die. I see an abundance of them swelling up from the new warmer temperatures, taking their long dirt naps on the roadsides. Oh the joys of Spring.
I took a short vacation South this year, at the end of winter. Mixed bag of emotions in that trip.
Saw my Mother who in the wisdom of her golden years moved on to a warmer climate. Miss her dearly, and am somewhat jealous. Gives me new things to worry about with her so far away, but also an excuse to visit more than I should.
Had a long overdue visit with a stepsister whom I had lost touch with, while down south. Wish I had taken time to know her better before this. Turns out she is fighting a very tough battle with cancer. I pray for her and her family. It really affects them all.
I'm still reflecting on this whole life and death thing.Would I want to know if I could how long I have to live? What would I do about it if I did know? Why don't we just behave everyday like we are dying, because in reality, we are. We just don't know when, or how.
I guess that sums it up. I worked, I traveled, I struggled to understand. I guess stepping away for a few months and looking back, wasn't so hard. I suppose I could write novels about it if I hyper focused on the details, but I'm not really that kinda gal. It is what it is. My new favorite saying. It just says it all.
Business has been quite a struggle and the economy has pretty well been the worst I have seen in my lifetime.
My sanity has come into question several times and I'm not even sure what that means or particularly care. I mean, what is sanity anyway. Somebody determines what normal is and any deviation from that puts you in some negatively percieved catagory. Whatever. I'm happy enough. I follow the rules and play along with "normal". Where I go inside my mind is my business, as long as it stays inside, right? No need for an answer here, really, it is rehtorical.
Spring has arrived in my home state and with it the rains that wash away the blues of winter. I watch them fade away and turn green. The flowers are once again appearing and I find myself braking more for those little critters and varmits that haven't learned the roadways are where they go to die. I see an abundance of them swelling up from the new warmer temperatures, taking their long dirt naps on the roadsides. Oh the joys of Spring.
I took a short vacation South this year, at the end of winter. Mixed bag of emotions in that trip.
Saw my Mother who in the wisdom of her golden years moved on to a warmer climate. Miss her dearly, and am somewhat jealous. Gives me new things to worry about with her so far away, but also an excuse to visit more than I should.
Had a long overdue visit with a stepsister whom I had lost touch with, while down south. Wish I had taken time to know her better before this. Turns out she is fighting a very tough battle with cancer. I pray for her and her family. It really affects them all.
I'm still reflecting on this whole life and death thing.Would I want to know if I could how long I have to live? What would I do about it if I did know? Why don't we just behave everyday like we are dying, because in reality, we are. We just don't know when, or how.
I guess that sums it up. I worked, I traveled, I struggled to understand. I guess stepping away for a few months and looking back, wasn't so hard. I suppose I could write novels about it if I hyper focused on the details, but I'm not really that kinda gal. It is what it is. My new favorite saying. It just says it all.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
No, as a matter of fact, I am not a writer...
Let me preface this initial entry, by letting the reader in on a little secret. I have no idea why I am writing this.
I have no direction in mind, and no purpose or intent.
I write when I am bored, lonely, or quite frankly trying to find an excuse for not doing anything more productive. There are thoughts deep in my mind, that this could be an asset to refer others to when they question my sanity, need to be updated on the goings on in my life or share photos, news and memories. I suppose it won't take up any substantial cyberspace, and won't be in anyones way. So, I guess the worse thing that will happen is that the page becomes another abandoned idea like, I am sure, many others before me have become.
Today, I bookmark this site, as a diversion to the cluttered facebook pages, I am becoming bored with. I gave some thought to going back to Myspace, but it seemed too complicated when I revisited a long since abandoned entry. I don't plan on followers for this, so there will be no one to entertain. Keeps it simple that way.
The new year has begun, and it is time for a fresh outlet for my thoughts. With that I will conclude entry number one is an excersise of my mind. No content, nothing thought provoking. Simple. Concise. Finished.
I have no direction in mind, and no purpose or intent.
I write when I am bored, lonely, or quite frankly trying to find an excuse for not doing anything more productive. There are thoughts deep in my mind, that this could be an asset to refer others to when they question my sanity, need to be updated on the goings on in my life or share photos, news and memories. I suppose it won't take up any substantial cyberspace, and won't be in anyones way. So, I guess the worse thing that will happen is that the page becomes another abandoned idea like, I am sure, many others before me have become.
Today, I bookmark this site, as a diversion to the cluttered facebook pages, I am becoming bored with. I gave some thought to going back to Myspace, but it seemed too complicated when I revisited a long since abandoned entry. I don't plan on followers for this, so there will be no one to entertain. Keeps it simple that way.
The new year has begun, and it is time for a fresh outlet for my thoughts. With that I will conclude entry number one is an excersise of my mind. No content, nothing thought provoking. Simple. Concise. Finished.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)